This is a 5 part Post on Co-dependency.

Part 4 of 5

Compliance patterns:

  • I compromise my own values and integrity to avoid rejection or others’ anger.
  • I am very sensitive to how others are feeling and feel the same.
  • I am extremely loyal, remaining in harmful situations too long.
  • I value others’ opinions and feelings more than my own and am afraid to express differing opinions and feelings of my own.
  • I put aside my own interests and hobbies in order to do what others want.
  • I accept sex and/or sexual attention when I want love.
  • I am afraid to express my beliefs, opinions, and feelings when they differ from those of others.
  • I make decisions without regard to the consequences.
  • I give up my truth to gain the approval of others or to avoid change.

I knew that what was happening between my husband and I was getting bad, but I was at a loss as to how to fix it.  I would just avoid him rather than talk about what was going on in my head.  I could never talk about my feelings with him because it always was a fight or he would say what I was feeling was stupid.  I was told by a few people that I should just leave him, I said you know what I took a vow.  I took a vow to stay with him through sickness and in health, through good times and bad.  I was willing to stay in a bad situation that was unhealthy for all parties due to that fact that I loved the other person and could not bear the thought of not being with him.  When I reached my breaking point it had gotten so bad that I was not sure there was any way out of the hole we both had been frantically digging.

To be continued…

If no one has told you they love you today, I love you and God does too!