Tag Archive: Food

So – 8 and a half days into becoming a non-smoker.  It has been a little harder this time than the others.  But this time I know its for good.  It has to be, I can’t keep doing this to my body and expect it to continue to forgive me.  With the upcoming life change of becoming parents, the bank account that reminded me all the time that smoking was expensive and waking up feeling like crap every morning – it was becoming really apparent that we needed to change this.  Hubby did break down and buy a pack last week so he is only at about 2 days at this point – but he didn’t drink or snap at me too bad during his first few days or even now.  His current job played a big role in him breaking down I fear.

He is still unhappy and still looking, but there is not a lot out there that is worth a damn or closer to home.  A 75 mile round trip everyday is killing us in fuel.  I hope he finds something that he likes and a better environment.  He likes what he does – just not the people or environment that he has to work in.

My work is going better this year – taking 11 days off really helped me stay calmer and recharge.  I get burnt out sometimes – its hard to unwind once in a while.  I have been cooking dinner almost every night – trying to work on a menu so that when Baby Girl gets here we have a bit of a set dinner routine.  I don’t cook with beef or pork, so its just chicken, turkey and fish.  I also cook lots of veggies (hubby is not a veggie person or a fish fan) and always try to have fresh or canned fruit in the house.  I know it going to be hard to get them used to our meal plans or trying to figure out that they like, if they have allergies or what they just will refuse to eat.  I had a picky eater for a sister growing up and a somewhat picky eater for a husband.  so I am a bit used to cooking 2 dinners – what he wants and usually fish and a Veggie for me.  I really don’t want to cook 3 different dinners every night.  if she has special diet requirements then I might have to, and that’s OK.  I want to introduce her to a healthy way to cook and that fruits and veggies are yummy.

So – I think this week I am going to try to make it to my meeting.  I hope hubby gets home on time so we can go, I really don’t want to go there alone.  OK, let me rephrase that – I don’t get to spend much time with him as it is, going to a meeting without him is yet more time that we are not with each other – after being separated summer of 2011, I am not a fan of it.  I know I can do things on my own now where as before when I was thick in my sticking thinking I thought that I just could no longer live if he was not in my life.  I know that I CAN, I just don’t WANT to.  And that’s how I have changed and grown with the help of Al-anon.

Not that the adoption paperwork is done – I might try to get back at my step four.  The application was like a step four, they asked all kinds of searching questions.  I had to be fearless and answer them truthfully.

If no one has told you they love you today, I love you and God does too!!


Stone soup…

OK – so hubby made me think of this last night and I just had to share cause I think it holds a good meaning.  I  think I was either in elementary school or Jr high, but we read the story about making stone soup.

A weary, poor traveler arrived in a small village. He had no food or money and had not eaten in days. The one thing he did have was a cooking pot that he used on those rare occasions

stone soup spoon

stone soup spoon (Photo credit: Hippy Jon)

when he had something to cook.
He built a small cooking fire, placed his pot on it, and poured in some water. When a few villagers asked what he was doing, he replied that he was making Stone Soup which was an ancient tasty recipe passed down to him from his ancestors. He then dropped in a smooth, round stone he had in his pocket into the pot.
As the soup warmed, the traveler told the villagers stories of his travels and the exciting things he’d seen. He tasted his soup and said it was coming along nicely, but a bit of salt would bring out the flavor. One curious villager went into her home and returned with some salt for the soup.

A few more villagers walking by stopped to see what was going on when they heard the traveler speaking. The traveler told more stories and said that a couple carrots or onion would be a nice addition to the already delicious soup. So, another villager figured he could give a few carrots and retrieved them from his cellar.

This continued on with the traveler casually asking for onions, seasoning, a bit of meat, celery, potatoes to bring out the full potential of the soup.
Finally, the soup was ready and everyone enjoyed the tasty meal prepared for them from just a stone, and a few other items.

I love this story and had totally forgotten about it till last night.  I feel that sometimes if you ask out right to get something “large” you might be met with resentment and a few doors slammed in your face.  But if you just ask for something very small to start you might end up with better results, and that includes wh

at we ask of ourselves.  Also to me this is about having faith.  He had to have faith that the people would begin to share small items with him and maybe a bit of curiosity to see what he was coming up with.  I must have faith in myself, I must have faith in my husband, I must have faith in my higher power and I must have faith in other people.  I have faith in my self that I can be a stronger person, I have faith in my husband that he can continue to stay sober, I have faith in my higher power that they will not give me more than they know I can handle and I must have faith in the members of my Al-Anon group who are always there when I need a shoulder or just some strength.

  If no one has told you they love you today, I love you and God does too!

Wednesday night dinner…

An unopened fortune cookie

Image via Wikipedia

I picked up dinner from a Asian restaurant on my way home from work, so they gave us two fortune cookies.  I have to say, every now and then we get some really good ones.  Tonight we got some awesome ones. Mine says:

Give to the world the best you have and the best will come back to you.

That’s what I am doing with this blog.  I try to give my all and pour out my heart here.  I have never felt better than I have since I started to write and go to my meetings.  It’s funny to me to look over and see him enjoying some orange chicken.  I could NEVER get him to try Oriental food before, and let me tell you I tried.  Since he has stopped drinking he has been willing to try more and more new foods.  He has come to really love steamed crab and that makes me very happy.  Hubby was pretty happy with his fortune cookie too.

For light, go directly to the source of the light, not to any reflections.

He said he feels that is what he did while drinking.  He would go from reflection to refection and never to a source of happiness.  Looking at the way we laugh and smile at each other now, I know its a true form of happiness.  He said he loves how he can enjoy being with the dogs now.  They are our kids due to the fact that I am unable to have children. (Because of some health issues) We do plan on adopting one day, but as of right now our three furry children are our little bundles of joy.  A Chihuahua, a Boxer Basenji Mix and a young pure bred Boxer.  He used to get frustrated and mad at the dogs, they are good kids, but they get a little wild now and then.  A Boxer pup was a new handful that I am not sure we were 100% ready for.  (Dozer Days) I do have another Blog I started when we got the pup we named Dozer.  I started that blog to share with people our new found love of the Boxer Breed.

I know he might not always say the he is happy or directly show that he is, but when I look into his eyes, I can see it. I hear it in his voice, I hear it in his laughter and I can feel it when he hugs me.  I love to be affectionate and I need to have that human contact.  I am so glad that he has begun to be more and more affectionate and has learned to express his feelings better.  He used to say I said “I love you” too much, but now he says he wants to hear it all the time.  We never hang up the phone with out saying “I love you, Drive safe.”  and in the mornings we add “have a good day” to that.

We had a bit of a fight once and hug up the phone without saying drive safe, well that day on my way home from work I got in a car accident.  So now we make sure that no matter what, we always say, I love you drive safe.  So, it is time for me to sign off and spend some time with my little family, so Good night and God Bless. Drive safe and have a wonderful night!

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